Reported Missing in action

By Sushama Kasbekar

(Email..Sushamakasbekar75@gmail.com)

The sound of those words grated on her. They spined round and round and twisted like a snake. She shifted uncomfortably in bed, aware that a big chunk of her life was over though they had been married for only a short time.

His photos hung on the wall and she studied the wedding day photos. How happy they looked on their wedding day. Her yellow sari and jewellery shone while his smart clothes made him look even more handsome than usual. They had been together for a short while before he left for duty at the frontier and were trying to build up a bond of understanding. But now…

Now she would have to wait an interminable seven years before they declared him a war hero who had been martyred in action. Her mind churned at the prospect of a lone future ahead. And suppose he was behind enemy lines, captive, unknown to the government and the army! Oh this unbearable pain of uncertainty. And what pain would he be suffering, she didn’t even know. Her eyes clouded and filled with unshed tears.

Suddenly her stomach churned hard and she had to run to the bathroom. She had barely reached it and the bile rose in a torrent and spouted forth from her mouth. She couldn’t stop the retching for a while and when it stopped she leant against the wall of the bathroom to rest feeling spent and worn out. Her mouth tasted foul and she rinsed it out vigorously.

As she left the bathroom her mind exploded. Was she pregnant? Her right hand went up to her forehead as she went back into the bedroom alone with her agitated mind, confused, frustrated and forlorn.